Louis

I’m standing at the back of the front bar at my local with my arms on what, I can only assume, was once a drinks counter, but now there is just a pump bottle of hand sanitiser, which I finger absentmindedly. It has been a slow night, not so many punters in, but that’s okay, I’m not really looking for much, just a little distraction from a dull Friday night.

Fight Club is playing on the big screen, in the back bar, which is a coincidence as I have just read a review that it is all about suppressed homosexual desire. I watched, I liked it, as much as I understood it, but I didn’t really see the allegory.

Suddenly, my mate, Charlie’s boyfriend, Louis is standing next to me, dressed in those shorts that are barely more than boxer shorts, a t-shirt and running shoes.

“Hi,” he says. Louis and I have never really spent any time together, we’re simply friends because of Charlie.

Momentarily, I wonder if I am dreaming, Louis, it must be a day dream, I must be going to wake up, I think. I am going to wake up. I go to pinch myself.

I didn’t know where he came from, he didn’t say. He just appeared.

“Hey? How are you?” I say. All I can say about Louis is that he seems nice. And, he has an interesting smile. He seems very conscious of his mouth, more so than is usual.

“Yeah. Good,” he says. And there is that smile. “How are you?” he asks.

“Yeah. Good,” I say. I didn’t know where he came from, he didn’t say. “You weren’t there a moment ago?”

“No, I just got here. Now.”

“You have cat like ability,” I say. Maybe I have had enough pots of beer.

He smiles again.

“You think?” he says.

I shrug.

He shrugs.

There is an awkward moment of silence. 

He stands side on to me. “You are clearly keeping up your gym work,” I say.

“Yes, it is a way of life,” he says.

“Healthier than hanging around bars in pubs, I guess.” That was lame, I think. 

He smiles. “I saw you over here and I came over to say hello.”

I hold my hands in the air, as if to say here I am. “Hello,” I say.

“You’re a hard man to find.”

“I am?” I say. I wasn’t really sure what that meant.

That makes him smile again.

“We never get to chat, you and me.”

“No.”

“We haven’t really got to know each other,” he says.

My right hand rests on his shoulder. He doesn’t pull away, he doesn’t flinch, he lets my hand rest there, unopposed.

I say, “I’m getting another beer, let me get you one.” 

“Okay,” he says.

I slide my hand along his t-shirt, without really thinking. I poke his hard chest. “You’ll have to show me how you stay so taught.”

I walk away shaking my head. What was I thinking with that comment? Just nerves, I put it down to.

Coy Louis, whenever there is a dirty story told, when we all get together, I could see him look off into the distance, as though he was picturing whatever it was that had just been describe; funny dirty anecdote, he’d always look away, think for a moment, then he’d smile. His coy, cheeky smile, handsome face, it was quite a look. If ever I think about him, and that’s how I see him kind of on the edge of our friendship group listening, I can picture that face.

I get two schooners at the bar. Might as well get big glasses I think, the two of us are going to need it.

He has found a stool when I get back, which he has pulled up next to mine.

“Here you go,” I say.

“Thanks,” he says.

We both say, “how have you been”, at the same time speaking over each other.

Then we wait for the other to speak.

We both smile at the same time.

We both say, “you go”, at the same time speaking over each other again.

We both laugh. How funny. What a hoot.

We both drink our beers, I think, as a visual cover for not speaking.

“We never get to know each other,” says Louis.

“No,” I say. “It’s always a group thing, never one on one.”

Louis holds up his beer. “Here’s to friendship.”

“Yes, here’s to us,” I say.

We both laugh. We clink glasses. We drink our beer.

I have never hung out with Louis one on one before. We don’t even talk much when we go out with friends. We are both a bit on the periphery when it comes to the two of us.

I know I don’t agree with the way they treat their dog, so I avoid that topic. What’s the little princess’s name, FooFoo. Never have her paws been allowed to touch the earth’s soil.

I know Louis likes to cook, me not so much. What could I say about cooking?

“Do you come here often?” I ask. Wow! That is the best you can do?

“No, first time,” says Louis. “You?”

“Occasionally,” I say.

Silence. We both chug on our beers.

“How’s the new Tesla going?” I ask.

He pulls a quizzical face. “I don’t drive,” he says.

“Oh,” I say. “Is it always Charlie?”

“Yes,” he says. “But, it is nice to sit in.”

“I’m sure,” I say.

Silence. We drink our beers again.

“Did you follow the Tigers, or the Storm, on the weekend,” Louis says.

“No,” I say.

“That were great matches,” he says.

We gaze at each other as we drink again.

“Don’t you think it is a shame Jacqui Lambie has been forced out due to these ridiculous citizen rules?” Louis says.

“No, not really, I think she is a one trick pony,” I say.

“Oh,” says Louis. “Don’t you think she is a breath of fresh air?”

“I think she is, um, basic,” I say.

Our beers go to our mouths almost in sync.

“It’s great the same sex plebiscite passed,” says Louis.

“I guess,” I say. “Are you going to get married?”

“No,” says Louis. “You?”

“No,” I say.

“The Rolling Stones last album was great,” I say.

“Was it?” says Louis. 

“What kind of music do you like?” I ask.

“Oh, pop, pretty much,” says Louis. “Kyle Minogue, Katy Perry. Taylor Swift.”

I try not to, actually, grimace.

“Are you going to the carnival?” asks Louis.

“No,” I say. “I don’t know, it’s just the same every year.”

“Oh,” says Louis.

Louis goes and gets us two more beers. It is stupid to say, but I felt a weight lift as soon as he walked away. I try to think of things to talk about while he is gone. 

He comes back with two more Schooners, surely, they should do the trick.

“The bar is pretty free,” says Louis. He puts our beers down in front of each of us. “They would have to hope for more patrons on a Saturday night?”

“I guess,” I say. “Where is Charlie tonight?”

“He’s home visiting his parents.”

“You don’t go too?” I ask.

“No,” says Louis. “Not really my thing.”

“Not into the inlaws?” I ask.

“Not when they don’t know they are,” he says.

“Oh,” I say.

We chug on our new beers.

Eventually, I say, “I don’t even know what you do?”

“Banking,” he says. “I studied business.”

“Oh really, me too,” I say. “What uni?”

“Swinburne.”

“Me too,” I say. “I loved Swinburne.”

“I did too,” says Louis. “It really suited me.”

“I think I really got more out of my course being at a smaller uni,” I say.

“Yes, me too,” says Louis. “I found it easy to manage.”

“I did too,” I say. “Well, I guess it is a perception, as it was the only uni I went to.”

“Yes, of course,” says Louis. “It just seemed easier to tame.”

“Yes,” I say. “I used to think the same thing.”

“Easier to manage,” Louis says. “I don’t think I would have liked a bigger uni.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” I say.

“Even though I never experienced it,” we both say in unison. “A bigger institution.” We also say together. We laugh.

“I think it was the key to my success,” I say.

“Me too,” says Louis. “Let’s drink to that.”

“Let’s,” I say.

We clink glasses.

“I’ll get more drinks,” says Louis.

“No, you got them the last time, it’s my turn,” I say. I practically skip to the bar, suddenly feeling much lighter.